Question: I have just finished Freshers’ Week and I still haven’t found my people. I like everyone I’ve met but there’s no real connection with anyone and I’m worried I’ve now missed my chance to meet new people. How do I still make friends after Freshers’ Week?
Answer: First of all, as cliché as it sounds, you are not alone – in fact, most people meet their true friends after Freshers’ Week. Freshers’ Week is potentially the most chaotic week you will ever have at University, so trying to find time to build meaningful connections, whilst also spending your time trying to meet as many people as possible, is hard. Now Freshers’ Week is over, it’s completely normal to feel lonely or isolated without social events organised for you.
The good news is, Durham is incredible for societies and sports – ranging from interests such as enjoying hummus, to more academic societies such as DUELS, or more relaxed and fun societies like Bee Keeping. Whilst sometimes social anxiety or nervousness can prevent us from trying new things and meeting new people, once you have done it you never regret it. I met all of my closest friends after Freshers’ Week, and joining societies and interacting with other colleges is the best way to find the people you connect with (after all, you clearly have something in common if you’re in the same society!).
If you want to build meaningful connections within your college, if it’s catered then sitting with new people in the dining hall is a great way to get to know others too. Everyone at University is so eager to meet new people, so you will never be judged for sitting with a group you don’t know and sparking conversation.
Every friendship begins without a real connection, yet with a few things in common to get you going, you find that overtime it will build and develop into something deeper. Don’t worry about the timings, I met my best friend in Term 2 of First Year; whereas others can meet them in Freshers’ Week. There’s no rush to find best friends, just as long as you keep putting yourself out there and be friendly to everyone you meet, eventually your people will come your way.
Featured Image: by Ahmed Nishaath on Unsplash