BREAKING: Mum Brings Up Weight Again

The Bubble has obtained an exclusive account of a lunch between a student and his (almond) mother. The findings were, in a word, heavy. SON: Hi mum! How are you doing? MUM: Never mind me, you’re certainly looking ‘healthy’. SON: Thanks? So, what do you fancy for lunch? MUM: Hmmm, let’s see, maybe the salad. […]