For sale: one set of 60 place mats depicting images of Buckingham Palace. Pre-loved; never used; slightly tarnished by being handled by politicians. Blood stains may come out. Would make a thoughtless present for loved ones this Christmas.
Inclusive with purchase: one tract of 169,000 miles of uninhabited frozen wasteland; perfect for chilling out with penguins or conducting nuclear tests.
For further information, contact:
Her Majesty The Queen